Granny Was A Love Child

Grandma finally left

the house today...

We were all very concerned

needless to say...

She had stayed in her room

for many years...

Ever since Elvis died

she had shed many tears...

She was a teenager

who experienced many a drug...

Came into her own

during the Summer of Love...

She had burned her bra

when she felt too confined...

Danced at Studio 54

where she danced The Grind...

She bedded many a man

before delivering my mother...

Never cared for the dad

but he was a good lover...

She took care of my mom

the best she could...

Gave up LSD while nursing

as a good mom should...

She read Ginsberg and Marx...

Talked often

of Timothy Leary...

But listening constantly

to Patty Smith and Yoko...

I would often grow

somewhat weary...

I bought her a new iPhone

to help her broaden

her scope...

But she got hooked

on porn

And became a misanthrope...

For the last ten years

She stayed locked

in her room...

Ordering Chinese food deliveries

And attending SLAA meetings

on Zoom...

Amazon delivered her packages

almost on a daily basis...

She loved virtual dating

on Bumble

Receiving gifts from men

without faces...

Then finally one day

She came out

and said

“I need a man

And a manly bed!”

She ran out the house

All dressed 

in black...

She was lookin for trouble

from some dude

named Jack...

The last we heard

She was go down

to the meat packing district...

We haven’t seen or heard

from her in weeks...

Maybe she’s another statistic...

They found her iPhone

in a trash bin

On Avenue B...

Filled with nude pics

that none of us

Ever really wanted to see...

But it was the very last shot

Where we lost all hope...

Grandma was holding

a black whip...

Spanking a man hanging

From the end of a rope...

She was staring

into her camera...

Wearing nothing more

than a wicked grin...

I immediately dropped the iPhone

Never wanting to see

that grin again...

© 2021 Jeffrey Pipes Guice